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Glitches and Self-Worth.

1/31/2023

3 Comments

 
I have had a mailchimp signup for years, but my self-doubt and thoughts that nobody wants to actually hear from me has consistently prohibited me from sharing my writings or posts. Oh, people who want to read will find out, will come, but I felt people would find me if they wanted to.  It is funny, because I manage social media for clients and volunteer work and have no issue promoting their work, because it is not personal about me. I know a lot of us, especially those of us that have taken on caregiving of our children for many years of their lives, diminish our own contributions and values in our minds and in the work we do. I recently counted up the volunteer hours in the past 5 years for one single organization, and the value of time was in the hundreds of thousands of hourly wage value. That is just ONE organization. Throughout that time, I rarely promoted the fact that I was volunteering thousands of hours per year, or, that I was doing important work to support others. Parenting is like that. We work work work work so hard but don't feel we deserve acknowledgement or recognition because that type of work is undervalued. Why am I telling you all this? Because I finally decided to use mailchimp and send out reminders to my subscribers, and to focus on posting more consistently to here and substack/medium. To create discussions and essays on things that are important to me. I updated and typed and worked and went through the process of using a new mailchimp feature I have not used before, and clicked begin, and the RSS feed didn't work properly. I noticed immediately that the link to the blog post was not in the mailchimp notification to my subscribers, but I thought nobody is going to read it, so I won't even bother sending another update. I didn't want to bother anyone.  I did get several unsubscribes immediately, and my imposter syndrome me said, see? Nobody wants to hear from you. One single person emailed me and said what link? Where is the blog post? THANK YOU for acknowledging me, and seeing me out here in your sea of inbox messages. That one small error made me completely reverse from happily starting to utilize the mailchimp that people actually signed up for, to doubting the value of communicating with folks or putting any more emails in the inbox. 

That small error and the subsequent anxiety from that error made me think about how much of our lives we spend diminishing our own work. We, meaning caregivers. Often parents who put their needs in the backseat for years to care for their children. Often moms, or people who identify as the mothers in the family dynamic, especially. We do spend thousands of hours per year serving others - our others - and society does not really value of the work we do. It is not only physical work, it is also emotional work.  So, when we also attempt to talk about the work we do, share our input in our homes and lives and communities, it is often done in a minimizing way. Nobody likes braggers, but self-promotion even in a sharing and community oriented platform can feel weird. Even if we are not selling anything. 

So, this is all to say I messed up the mailchimp on the blast yesterday - sorry. I know some folks have been subscribed for ages, and I have never sent anything out to your inbox. So, hello, I am Denise, and I like to write about permaculture, gardening, growing, making food and herbal products for my family, canning and preserving, baking, herbal health, plant conservation, solar power, chickens, homestead living, homeschooling/unschooling, parenting, books, handmade things, and more.  I have been working on a book and garden designs and things, and wanted to start publishing here in this space more often and sharing more again. I apologize for the blankish email yesterday, but now I got it figured out. Now, I just need to see the value in what I share to other people, and continue to work to connect and build this community. Working on it. 
3 Comments
Elizabeth Ashley
2/2/2023 02:31:29 pm

Thank you, Denise. I've followed you on socials for a long time and always gotten so much from what you share. I relate to this post deeply. Happy to see you in my inbox. ✨️

Reply
Gabriel Mojay link
3/11/2023 07:54:44 am

You and I, we could be a perfect working pair--
You could Virgo provide every compassionate capability
Under the sun
And with perfect clear-faced wisdom

And we two could share
Sagittarian humanitarian time handcrafting our responsibility
To the sun,
And with impeccably fearless wisdom…

What would *I* do, you may well ask?
Actually wife, too— that was *her* query!…

Well, be your brother— in body, a bigger one,
In accomplishment, your little:
But I’ve got crayons of every color
And want to be friends with everyone

Come on now— blood or spittle?
For your every miraculous action
I could cartwheel snap-happily
And provide a very pretty theory

By a budding ami of my amie Ammy

Reply
S Beam
6/6/2023 06:53:46 pm

I found you through the Lily Consortium. The more I read the more I am in awe at what you have accomplished. I love the UNSCHOOLED piece you wrote. I actually never heard that term before. My children are in their 30's now, and i am SO glad that they are not in the current educational system, it so broken. I have always grown some medicinal plants (im an herbalist and acupuncturist in CA) and I am laying space for a permaculture transformation to grow food and medicine. Thank you for the time and effort that you have spent putting this beautiful website together. Im sure I will learn alot!

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    whollyrooted.com

    denise cusack

    I am a certified aromatherapist, clinical herbalist, permaculture designer,  organic gardener, plant conservationist, photographer, writer, designer, artist, nature lover,  health justice activist, whole foods maker, and mother of two young adults  in south central Wisconsin. 

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  • Home
  • About
    • About Our Family
    • About Denise Cusack
    • Sustainable Practices >
      • Plant Conservation/Botanical Sanctuary
  • Analu Perfume
    • Analu Perfume for Good
    • Natural Perfumery
  • What I Do
    • Health Justice + Mutual Aid >
      • Seed Grants & Donation Distribution Network
      • Grow Herbs for HWB
      • Volunteer With Us
    • Regenerative Herbalism & Aromatherapy
    • Permaculture Education
  • My Work
    • Teaching/Speaking >
      • Upcoming Presentations
      • Past Webinars, Podcasts & Classes
    • Writing
    • Clinical Aromatherapy
    • Clinical Herbalism
    • Flower Essences
    • Freebies
    • Other Work >
      • Where We Are Located
      • What I'm Reading
      • Unschooling
      • Denise Art + Design >
        • Denise Art
        • Photography
  • Blog
    • Blog Archive
    • Recipe Archive >
      • Food + Pantry
      • Herbs + EO's
  • Contact+